So Far, So Good

So in my life I have found that February is ALWAYS the worst month of the year for me. Every year, it never ceases to give me experiences that cause me to spend hours crying and praying, etc. I always dread the coming of February.

But so far, so good!

My life is going pretty well. School is hard, and I am struggling a little money wise (I didn't work much in January because of Singin' in the Rain), and I don't really get to socialize. But you know what? That's not too bad! I am perfectly fine with mediocre life.

Now I am afraid that because I brought this to my attention, something bad will now happen in the next 18 days. EEEK! haha

Lexi

Lexi and I have been best friends since 5th grade. That is a very long time! We were debate partners in sixth grade, locker partners for all of jr high, and we went to EFY together in high school. Plus we've done about a million other things together! So today she called me and asked me if I wanted to hang out with her. Of course, I said yes! She said she really wanted to go to the temple tonight. I thought that was a brilliant Idea!!!! So we went. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful friend who keeps me on the straight and narrow. Plus, Lex ALWAYS makes me laugh! Tonight after we went to the temple we went to Target and just looked at stuff and didn't buy anything. We realized tonight that we visited Target for no reason many times throughout the years: in elementary school, jr. high, high school, and now college. We are pretty predictable! Lex and I have way too many memories to count, but here are some of my favorites:

*In fifth grade, we both wanted highlights in our hair SO BADLY!!!! Everyday at recess we would talk about the colors we would choose, blah blah blah. So one day at my house we got a brilliant idea: we would take my gold gel pens, break them in half, and streak our hair with them. Yeah it was way awesome!!!!! It made a mess, but our hair looked so cool! haha

*In sixth grade, Lex discovered that she had the ability to talk like a southern baptist preacher. So, at recess, she would stand on a bench and start yelling, "Brothas and sistas, you need to repent!....."and people would gather around her. At this point I would use my fantastic vocal skills and sing Hallelujahs and such in the background of her sermon. Everyone thought we were insane.

*In seventh grade, Lex would always try to make me miss the bus after school. We shared a locker, and at the end of the day she would take out my violin or my shoes or something I needed and chuck it down the hall as far as she could, and then when I was trying to run after them she would tackle me to the ground so I couldn't reach it..We both would be screaming and wrestling and laughing and causing a big scene. It is really strange I know but it really was fun!

*In ninth grade, we did a duet of "Homeward Bound" for solo and ensemble. We did really well and ended up with a 1 at Region, which is a high as a jr. high kid can get. People would come up to us in the halls of school and ask us to sing the song, and we would sing it acapella for everyone. And everyone was so impressed with our harmonies. We thought we were so cool.

Lex and I really have a really strange friendship, if you can't tell. And we pretty much were the entertainment for the people around us until about jr. year when we calmed down a little bit. It's been crazy, but I love it! And I Love Lexi!

The Bob

So in 2007, Angela Brown, director of BHS musicals, said we needed to each buy a wig that was a bob for Thoroughly Modern Millie. Everyone complained that we had to spend so much money on a wig we would never use again. I complained as well. But now I see that it was a great investment because I was able to wear it in two more musicals. They were both at RMT, and if I didn't have my own wig I would have had to have worn ugly, nasty looking wigs. But now I think my wig needs to be retired. It's falling apart. Thank you, Bob. You have served me well!

Millie 2007
Above: Millie 2009
Below: Singin' In the Rain 2010
Notice how limp my bangs are and how thin the wig is.

RE: I'm an adult!

But apparently not adult enough :(

I'm an adult!

Yep, I am! haha! So I have been spending a lot of time with people in my cast who are 24+, and guess what? I LOVE IT!!!! I'm so used to feeling like I'm a part of the Musicult, but I just go to a different school and pay for my stuff with my own money and am more mature, but that's about it! I am usually always so sad that I am not hanging out with the High School kids, but I'm getting over it! Don't get me wrong, I love them all and plan to know them for the rest of my life, but I think a lot of them have some growing up to do first! But suddenly, I have found adults to hang out with! For now, at least!

Some of the Singin' cast! Also, I went to a singles ward today with Breanna, and some new friends from RMT: Ben, Kati, and Jamie. It was a little weird because I didn't really know anyone else, but I felt pretty comfortable!

Yep, I officially grew up at age 19.5! Aren't you proud?

I'm Singin' In the Rain!

I was really not looking forward to going back to school this semester, but this week has been so great! First of all, I got a letter from this missionary who I haven't talked to in forever! It was so wonderful to know how he's doing!

Then, Singin' in the Rain opened, and it went so well! We went to Chili's after the show and it was a blast! This cast only has 18 people so we get to know each other a lot better than with a big cast. I love it! I always love performing, but I really look forward to this show; more than I have for any other show, except Les Mis, of course! haha. The show is so crazy! I'm a member of the ensemble, yet I am in...probably 70% of the scenes? I made that up, but it sounds right to me. And I have so many costume changes. I literally spend the whole first act running between the stage and the dressing room! But the show is a blast to be in! I'm so glad I chose this show instead of Kiss Me, Kate.

Come see the show if you can!

Another W.W.O.B.

Once upon a time, I started this blog. In this blog, I posted W.W.O.B.s, which stand for Wise Words of Bretleigh. For some reason, people are always coming to me for advice. These things pop out of my mouth, and then they think I'm extremely profound and mature. While I do agree that I am mature, I am not profound. Actually, I just listened to my mom, YW leaders, insitute teachers, etc, and I pass their wisdom on to others.

Me looking wise....?

This time, however, I put these thoughts together in my own words, which is why they sound a lot harsher, and probably make no sense. Here is my W.W.O.B:

Happiness has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO with your life going well. Nothing. You could have the crappiest life ever and still be happy. I do not believe that happiness and being content are the same thing. You can be happy no matter what.

As I have mentioned before, January-March of 2009 pretty much were not fun for me. Someone I trusted more than anyone else had lied to me, I lost a best friend, I felt super alone, I wasn't going to BYU, and then my back-up plan, the U, had also fallen through. I was doing two musicals and choir stuff, and sterling scholar portfolios. I had no time to see friends and I really never even saw my family because I was always gone. And the fear that I will live my whole life alone randomly came out and scared me a lot during this time. My self esteem has always been pretty good but it was really low. I was miserable, and I was not content. People would ask me if I was ok, but you know what? I could never say that I wasn't happy. During that time, whenever I thought about how stinky everything was going, I always knew that I had a Heavenly Father that loved me, and that He knew that I was tough and he was only trying to make me stronger. I knew that Christ knew exactly how I felt, and that eventually, things would get better. It is impossible to be unhappy if we know that Heavenly Father loves us, because we know that someone is on our side and believes in us.

You know what? Things did get better for me. Everything didn't magically disappear, but I learned how to handle struggles and appreciate my Heavenly Father more. I think I learned more in that short little time than in the rest of my life.

Here is a sidenote to my W.W.O.B:

Happiness comes from serving others. When I spend my time focusing on myself and how miserable I am, nothing ever gets better. It is impossible to be happy if you only think about yourself. But when you serve others you recieve joy because you catch a glimpse of Heavenly Fathers love for us.

So, if you are not happy, you know what to do. That doesn't mean your problems will go away, but they will become bearable.